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Frightening - guess

  Frightening. It's frightening me what I have got in my head. I am thinking about something that I should not. Suddenly, out of nowhere I feel I am wrong. I have felt this before too. But this time, people's faces are coming into my head. Not any people, it's (it was) my friends' faces. The ones I love and care. People are asking what's wrong with me. It's not like the usual wrongs I think of. Or maybe it is. I love myself and there's no stopping it. It's only me who can be me. (applies to every single individual) The thought says, I have friends more than I need of when I need only one to talk about anything important. (who said so; the thought I guess). I feel like I am blabbering. I feel abnormal. It's not the first time. Just so the thought says so, I can't be wrong. I know who I am. I can't be wrong about anything important when I talk to my friends. I don't talk altogetherly (no such word). Letting heavy things out of my mind makes
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I - of

I am who I am and there's no changing it. Sometimes, being yourself can be frustrating. I don't know whether the words that come out of my mouth are my own or not. But, I am saying it for some reason, which is (are) pointless in nature. I am sometimes awestruck at hearing my own words, that I become obliviated (this word doesn't exist, it seems). Being pointless is what i least wanna be in my life, I guess that is what every normal person's notion or goal whenever they open their mouth. It's only very recently, maybe a year or two that I started loving myself.That feeling can never make you feel lonely. But I sometimes feel that could make someone overconfident and arrogant. Those are the words that I have hated since my childhood. The point is that I have no point when I am talking about something important. This may not be true but something tells me so. Sometimes I am driven by words I didn't have to think of.
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